rockingyourrole

For women who Rock their Role in work and life

Archive for the tag “Women”

On the Move

moving-truck-vintage

Thank you so much to you for taking the time to read this blog over the past year.

The highlight so far was the day I received 4606 visits!

You may know that there are 2 sides to my business:

1. Reflexion Associates – Leadership coaching and coach training in organisations

2. Rocking Your Role – my book, speaking engagements, training and support for women executives, entrepreneurs and breadwinners

I have decided to consolidate my blog into my sites and would really appreciate it if you would subscribe to one or both of my blogs in their new home.

I won’t be posting here any longer.

1. Reflexion Associates blog – http://reflexion-uk.co.uk/?cat=17 , register for updates via the newsletter sign up box at the top of the page

2. Rocking Your Role blog –  http://rockingyourrole.com/blog/ , add your email in the subscribe box

See you at the house warming

Warm wishes

Jenny

Jenny Garrett

+44 (0) 844 776 4744

jenny@reflexion-uk.co.uk

info@rockingyourrole.com

www.reflexion-uk.co.uk

www.rockingyourrole.com

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The gentler side of Pakistan?

Muna is one of the mentees on the Cherie Blair Foundation programme, that supports female entrepreneurs in developing countries. She has written a blog to show her view of Pakistan on International Womens Day, which differs from all the bad press we have read recently.

Muna’s Craft Company: Women’s Day in Pakistan

Enjoy the read, it’s enlightening and contains some of her beautiful crafts.

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Find out more about me, my programmes, speaking engagements and training at rockingyourrole.com and sign up for my newsletter

130 Vs 70/20/10

Andrew Priestley is one of the guest speakers on my Women’s Leadership Success programme taking place on 4th March, 2013

Below he shares his thoughts on why we should all be living by the 70/20/10 rule

Andrew Priestley ISMM-2

Most Brits spend 130% of their take-home weekly pay. This means that they are funding the additional 30% on credit cards, loans and store charge cards. This quickly becomes a long term cash-debt problem.
And sadly, it is self-inflicted.
There are several key reasons why debt occurs but the biggest causes are spending more than you earn i.e., living beyond your means; and spending more than you need to. The one that bugs me the most is buying stuff you don’t really need. For example, bright, shiny, new stuff.
I was recently in an electronics store and I overheard a young married couple arguing over whether or not to buy a gaming console and 3D TV. They were weighing up a 15 month non-payment loan.
But it can be really benign stuff. Recent food shopping research shows that people spend nearly 40% more than they need to at the weekly grocery shopping expedition … if they don’t use a shipping list.
Fortunately, debt is something that you can cycle out of. In my experience you can be well on the way to debt-free with 90 days but it takes commitment and energy.
The starting point is to learn to live on 70% of your take home pay. 10% you should save. And 20% you should use to reduce debts.
In addition, you can sell any stuff that you no longer need. A client recently sold over 100 pairs of shoes she doesn’t wear! She made £350 but that money was used to reduce her credit card bill. A musician sold some sound gear and musical instruments and a) banked £2300, b) paid off a loan and c) emptied his loft and garage.
Two university students followed the 70/20/10 rule for 3 months and booth have surplus cash for the first time ever!
One client reduced her debt and created a nice little nest egg of cash … and then ‘borrowed’ it to her brother who is still to repay her.
In his talk  at the Women’s Leadership Success programme we will explore the 70/20/10 rule and show you ten money managing skills that will get you out of debt and cashed up.

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Find out more about me, my programmes, speaking engagements and training at rockingyourrole.comand sign up for my newsletter

5 Reasons Why Women Feel So Guilty

Amber Khan is one of the guest speakers on my Women’s Leadership Success programme taking place on 4th March, 2013

Below she shares her thoughts on why women feel so guilty.

9a59560be6535da6ef20b75b7a52d073Women can feel guilty about any & everything. For many women, the driving force in their lives is guilt. Somewhere along the way, it all becomes a matter of doing it all.

According to a daily mail article, a survey has found that more than 96 per cent of women feel guilty at least once a day, while for almost half, the feeling strikes up to four times a day.

Women tend to…

  • Be perfectionists. You feel guilty because you feel as though you have to live up to unrealistic expectations, and you cannot make mistakes.
  • Blame themselves. If you fail at even the slightest thing, you start to blame yourself for not being good enough. Then you feel guilty for being somehow “lesser than” all those women/mothers who seem to be doing it right.
  • Can’t say No. Throughout history, women have been those who pleased others. Admit it we are people pleasers. Even when you really want to say NO, the only 3 letter word which comes out of your mouth is YES. If you do say No, the feeling immediately turns into guilt.
  • Put others first. We care for our partners, families, friends & co-workers. We do & buy things for them but feel guilty when we consider those things for ourselves or even to take time out for ourselves.
  • Be control freak. We tend to take responsibility of everything at work or at home and shy away from delegating chores. Why? Because we are afraid of losing control. We’d rather boast about our multi-tasking skills than face the music of feeling ill, stressed, overweight & exhausted.

The guilt builds and builds until it becomes not a consequence, but rather, that driving force that keeps you moving forward even as a little piece of you is screaming to slow down, take a deep breath, take it easy, and don’t let life sweep you away with the tidal wave.

Do you recognise any of the above traits in yourself, found yourself nodding away to some?

Come along to the Women’s Leadership Success programme to find strategies to ditch the guilt

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Find out more about me, my programmes, speaking engagements and training at rockingyourrole.comand sign up for my newsletter

Floella Benjamins 4 C’s philosophy on life

Floella Benjamin

At the age of 64 Floella Benjamin is still lively and youthful. For those of my generation Floella is best known for being a presenter on the children’s TV show Play School

What you might not know is that on 28 June 2010, Lady Benjamin was introduced to the House of Lords as a Life Peer nominated by the Liberal Democrats with title Baroness Benjamin, of Beckenham in the County of Kent.

In this role Floella is a campaigner for families and especially children. I met Floella once, the experience evoked so many childhood memories that I babbled like a schoolgirl and she politely and kindly smiled at me – I imagine this happens to her all the time.

This week Floella led a talk on Women in the 21st Century at the House of Lords, which I joined online. She shared her 4 C’s philosophy for life and I am sharing them with you below:

1 – Consideration – not to be judgemental – you never know what others situations are, just because they are not reacting in the way you want them to, or by your rules, it doesn’t mean that it’s personal.

2 – Contentment – have a happy and contented heart – don’t be jealous of others, instead learn to live with less. She asked ‘Why are we neglecting our children, why do we always want more?’

3 – Confidence – have high self esteem, high self worth – you need to be able to look in the mirror and say I like that person looking back at me. The more you give, the more you will receive, even if that wasn’t your intention.

4 – Courage – stand up for truth – always stand up for what your believe in!

Floella also mentioned the specific challenges that women have, such as being invisible in the workplace and she said that black women may have to take their foot off the accelerator so not as to be perceived as aggressive in the work place.

Her comment that most resonated with me was ‘women are like babies, throw them in the deep end and they’ll survive’

So what do you think about Floella’s 4C’s? It”s likely one will stand out for you that you will particularly need to work on. Take a look and work out why and what you might need to do.

Looking at 64 year old Floella, this philosophy obviously has anti ageing effects, so its worth a try!

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Find out more about me, my programmes, speaking engagements and training at rockingyourrole.com and sign up for my newsletter

How to make your Marriage more Exciting

Happy Couple sitting under a treeAny long-term relationship will need invigorating at some point. Busy lives, children, work and the drudgery of life (by drudgery I mean housework) can really get in the way of focusing on your relationship.
Before you know it, you haven’t really spoken in a week. Ships passing in the night, living in the same home, but having a pretty transactional relationship, or just too tired to engage and taking each other for granted.

Here are 5 ways to make your Marriage more Exciting

1. Discover together
Whether it’s a new restaurant, new country, new sport or new hobby, discover something that neither of you have tried nor experienced before and go for it. This will provide you with something different to talk about and share, you are likely to realize that there is still more to learn about each other.

2. Nurture
You don’t expect your plants to survive without water, or your friends to keep calling if you take no interest in them, do you? In the same way your partnership cant thrive without some commitment to helping it grow and develop. Regular date nights, even if they are at home with a movie and a picnic on your living room floor are critical for reconnecting.

3. Look and feel ‘hot’
I know you want to relax when you get home, slip on that onesie and a pair of slippers, but what does that do for your marriage? If you feel your best, your partner will sense that and make the effort also, helping you to rekindle your attraction to each other.

4. Reminisce
Perhaps you have kids who have taken over most of your daytime hours, or are working or studying hard. With these demands it’s easy to forget the good times and what interested you about partner in the first place. You could watch your wedding video, look at old photos, or revisit the music you both loved when you first met. This will reawaken the emotions you felt when you were first together.

5. Create a sanctuary
Have a space in your home where distractions such as mobile phones and TV’s are not allowed, so that you can focus on each other. Talking, listening and relaxing in comfort, nurturing your friendship.

Marriage is a marathon not a sprint, so don’t think that you can do this for a week and then forget about it. It’s a continual commitment that will reap real rewards. Give it a try.

I’ll leave you with a quote from Barbara de Angelis

Marriage is not a noun; it’s a verb. It isn’t something you get. It’s something you do. It’s the way you love your partner every day.

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Find out more about me, my programmes, speaking engagements and training at rockingyourrole.com and sign up for my newsletter

How to Be the Most Organized Person in the World (Infographic)

I came across this fabulous infographic via Skirts and Ladders, a new network led by Lily Dey, designed to release the potential of early career women and accelerate their journeys as future leaders.

I was very flattered to learn that Lily has read Rocking Your Role, and chosen it to launch the Skirts and Ladders book club taking place on 12th February, 2013 at Canary Wharf,to find out more go to the Skirts and Ladders website.

Be the most organized person in the world

More Health and Fitness News & Tips at Greatist.

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Find out more about me, my programmes, speaking engagements and training at rockingyourrole.com and sign up for my newsletter

Exclusive – 50 Tried and Tested Business Tips – Final Day and full resource

 

Sage 50 Tried and tested Business Tips

Sage 50 Tried and tested Business Tips

Welcome to the final day of my sharing exclusive tips from Sage’s 50 Tried and Tested business tips resource, that I have been given early access to as a Sage Business Expert.

The resource has the following sections:

  1. Start Your Business
  2. Grow Your Business
  3. Manage Cash Flow
  4. Control Your Costs
  5. Work Life Balance
  6. Employing People
  7. Beating Business Fears

Yesterday I shared a practical tip from the Employing People and today I am giving you access to the full resource and a final tip on Beating Business Fears.

Todays Tip from the Beating Business Fears is:

Step out of your comfort zone

Everything that you desire, wish for, dream of, everything you want is outside of your comfort zone, so you need to step out to get it. Here are the keys to stepping-out:

• Accept, face, embrace, and push through your fears to break through your comfort zone

• Learn how to embrace the uncomfortable every day with daily actions

• Every time you will stretch outside of your box, you will grow (it is a never-ending process)

• It takes courage to step out of your comfort zone, so have someone to stand by your side as you do

Your ability to move forward depends on your ability to make decisions and on your ability to step out of your comfort zone: take actions and make it happen.

And here it is, the full resource from Sage 50 Tried and Tested Business Tips, I do hope you find it useful

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners.

Exclusive – 50 Tried and Tested Business Tips – Day 4

Sage 50 Tried and Tested Business Tips

Sage 50 Tried and Tested Business Tips

Welcome to Day 4 of my sharing exclusive tips from Sage’s 50 Tried and Tested business tips resource, that I have been given early access to as a Sage Business Expert.

The resource has the following sections:

  1. Start Your Business
  2. Grow Your Business
  3. Manage Cash Flow
  4. Control Your Costs
  5. Work Life Balance
  6. Employing People
  7. Beating Business Fears

Yesterday I shared a practical tip from the Manage Cash Flow section, and on Day 7, I will give you access to the full resource.

Do keep posted.

Todays Tip from the Control Your Costs Sections is:

Negotiate energetically

Business energy contracts are automatically renewed. Make a note of contract dates and give the required notice to allow room for negotiation

Your business could be losing money simply because you are not ‘managing’ costs.  Keeping on top of contracts, negotiating, and shopping around could save you a small fortune.

Become a smart spender and a savvy negotiator, you have no excuse with the internet at your fingertips.

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners. Tomorrow I’ll share a tip on Work Life Balance from the Sage 50 Tried and tested business tips.

Stay at home Dads / Female Breadwinners – Two sides of the same coin?

stay_at_home_dadwork-life-balance_crop380w5-1

What a week its been for families.

The European Commission revealed research which showed that there has been growth of 10% in Female breadwinners during the economic crisis, and official employment statistics revealed this week also showed that  men now make up nearly 10 per cent of those who care for children while their partner goes out to work.

The Telegraph initially picked up this story and I was interviewed by Emma Sinclair  from their Wonder Women feature, she questioned Why Female Breadwinners are still Taboo. This was followed quickly by Sam Marsden who featured the story on the Rise in Stay At Home Fathers being fuelled by the growth of Female Breadwinners on front page of the Telegraph

Marie Claire, the Daily Mail and even the Wall Street Examiner quickly picked up on the story

Why is this news worthy, i hear you groan?

Because it seems that an important maybe transformation shift might just be taking place right under our noses.

The reason could be that traditionally male dominated sectors, such as construction and finance have been hardest hit by the recession and so men are finding themselves out of work, having to retrain or sit it out until things improve. It could also be that women are ‘cheap‘ and when making tough decisions about cost, a woman doing the same job will cost you around 82% of what a man would have done.

However, there may be something more fundamental than a temporary or circumstantial blip taking place, men and women may be actually being honest about what they enjoy.  If you are a man who has been slogging it out for many years in a career that you don’t enjoy and perhaps been an almost absent father, why shouldn’t you be able to put all of your energy into home making, without being teased by your friends, treated in fascination by the yummy mummies at the playgroup or called lazy by the older generation?

If you are a woman who has felt unvalued by employers because you work part-time, or may inconvenience them by having a baby at some point.  Or felt that you couldn’t leave your children as you didn’t have childcare that you could trust, how wonderful to now have a stay at home Dad to rely on.

The truth is being the breadwinner is hard whether you are the man or woman, however women take on more of the household and caring responsibilities whatever their role. They also feel guilty about not giving their all in and outside the home, whereas men appear to be more focused in their approach and don’t carry the guilt so heavily on their shoulders.

It seems we have a lot to learn from each other, but it starts with accepting that roles are changing and that its OK. I would argue that it is still taboo and that when a woman tells you that hubby is at home with the kids you search for an explanation for it.  For some reason there needs to be an excuse, we should stop searching for this.

Breadwinning is easy when there is enough money to go around, but much harder when the bread you win isn’t enough.  Let’s face it there has to be some pay off!

My wish is that we just make it easier – easier for women and men to have flexible working, easier for families to craft the balance they want traditional or not. Fundamentally men and women will need some help adapting to these roles, navigating the work place and their lives in a way that is radically different.

This freedom will bring choices, let’s hope we make the right ones.

Have your say on the subject of Breadwinners, please complete and share this survey  by 31st January, 2013

I am Jenny Garrett, Executive Coach, founder of Reflexion Associates, a leadership and coaching consultancy and author or Rocking Your Role – the how to guide to success for female breadwinners.

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